As she drove Jon home, her phone, which was connected to the car for music and GPS, had been blowing up with messages from Brady. She kept having to swipe them off the dashboard screen so Jon wouldn’t see Brady’s name pop up. When Jon had gotten out of the car, she was finally able to check her texts. It was mostly a bunch of drunken gibberish, but Brady had made it clear that he hoped she would come over.
She thought about it, wondering if she really wanted to hook up with a drunk guy when she was stone cold sober. Whiskey Dick is definitely a real thing, so she wondered if it was even worth her time. The deciding factor, though, was his insistence on how good he was with his tongue. At the very least, if he couldn’t perform, she’d still be able to get hers, so she agreed to go meet up with him.
She texted Brady that she was on her way, and then input his address to her GPS. Coincidentally, he lived literally 5 minutes away from Jon. Very convenient, actually. She headed over there and texted him when she arrived. He was still in an Uber on his way home. It was about 10 minutes before a black car with tinted windows pulled up. She then saw this sharply dressed, albeit stumbly, red headed man emerge from the backseat. He had on a beige peacoat that he buttoned up as he walked towards his house. Very classy, even though he was drunk and a little bit messy.
She got out of her car and walked up to meet him. He smiled and greeted her with open arms. Damn, he was so hot. They walked up his front stoop and briefly recounted their evenings as he unlocked the front door. Even in his drunken state, he was charming and funny and just the right amount of pervy. Cheeky, even. Whatever he was, he turned her on and she was happy she had gone over.
His house was like a tri-level type thing. The main entrance was on the lower level, and you had to walk up a set of stairs to get to the kitchen and living room. It was a really nice house. They walked upstairs and in to the kitchen. She leaned back against the island and he offered her a beer. As she opened it and took a sip, he stepped in real close, his face hovering closely above hers. As he gazed down at her with a sexy stare, he slipped his hand into her shirt and kissed her. They made out a bit as he felt her up, then she started rubbing him outside his jeans. It felt like he was up to the challenge, but as she unzipped him, she realized that nope, he definitely was not.
And while we’re on the subject, she was actually kind of happy he couldn’t fully get it up. This was not a particularly attractive penis she was looking at, not that any of them are, really. But she had never seen such a skinny dick before! Small, sure. But his wasn’t particularly small or short, just incredibly, incredibly skinny. Like, have you ever heard the term “needle dick”? It’s very crass, of course, but for the first time in her life, she understood what that meant. What a disappointment! It was then, though, that he lifted her chin and tilted her head up to look him in the eyes. “Can I lick you now?” he asked. Ah, the silver lining.
They hurried up the next flight of stairs and headed to the bedroom. “Get naked” he ordered her. Mmm, yes sir! She lay down on the bed and he crawled on top of her. They started making out again, his hand moving down her body as he started to pleasure her. Soon, he moved his way down, and began to work those tongue skills he had been raving about.
It was good, for a bit. But eventually he was just completely missing the mark. She actually started to get a little bored. He must have sensed that she wasn’t in to it, because it was then that he paused and opened his night stand drawer. Low and behold, a magic wand vibrator.
Now, let’s be clear. Did she want to use a sex toy that she knew for certain had been used on other women? No she did not. But! Was she so sexually frustrated at that point, knowing he wouldn’t be getting her off, and knowing that she wouldn’t be able to go home and use her own vibrator because her parents were home/it was like four in morning at that time? Yes. The answer is yes.
All she wanted to do was finish what he had started. She made sure the vibrator was clean, then just did her thing. He loved it and enjoyed watching her. As soon as she was done, she jumped up and ran in to his en suite, closing the door behind her. She grabbed the hand soap and lathered herself up, making sure she was as clean as she could be, before coming back out. The idea of having shared a sex toy with who knows how many other women, just made her feel… blech.
When she opened the door, he was laying in the bed welcoming her in for a cuddle. She threw her tank top on and joined him, but at that point it was just awkward. The moment had definitely passed, so she got herself dressed and Brady followed her out, still completely naked.
Even after he had failed to please her, he was still putting on the charm. He flirted with her as she zipped up her boots, his skinny little wiener just danglin’ away. Brady kissed her goodbye as she opened the door and left. She got in her car and looked at the time; 4:30am. “What a waste!” she thought to herself. When she got home, she smoked a joint in the garage and headed up to bed as quietly as she could. Despite the disappointing ending, everything before that was great, and she had still had a super fun night.
The next morning she woke up to two texts from Brady, making sure she had enjoyed herself. She didn’t want to shame his shitty tongue skills or thin equipment, so she said she had a fun time, but suggested that if it did happen again, that they both be sober. Then she took a shower.
Surprisingly, Brady stayed in contact. He’d reply to her Instagram stories, or send her dirty pics here and there. His junk looked much bigger in pictures. She enjoyed the attention and found that they kind of became just like, flirty Instagram buddies. He’d ask her what her weekend plans were, she’d tell him and ask him the same. Often they’d each have dates with other people, and would end up wishing the other luck. It was during those conversations that he’d confessed to her how much he enjoyed “sloppy seconds,” as he put it.
Turns out Brady was pretty freaky. He got off on having a girl sleep with someone else, then go over to his place and he’d have sex with her again. He liked it even more if the guy had finished inside the girl, and then he’d get to eat her out afterwards.
Told ya. Freaky.
In the nearly two years of her being single, she had learned that everyone has their thing. So, even weird stuff like that didn’t necessarily scare her away. If she could handle Chad the Foot Fetishist, she could handle Brady wanting her to fuck other guys. In fact, the more he talked about it, the sexier it sounded. Maybe not the part about finishing inside her and him eating some other guys.. stuff.. out of her (😬). But the idea of her having sex with someone, and Brady wanting her so badly afterwards he has to fuck her too? That was kind of hot. At the very least, she entertained the idea of it over text.
Soon, December had arrived and society was doing it’s best to focus on Christmas, rather than the world falling to pieces. Early that month, she and her friends had arranged to have a Friendsmas gettogether. One of her friends and her fiancé had graciously offered to host, and had even gone as far as organizing a Murder Mystery Christmas dinner. Everyone had their own characters to play, and it was such a creative and unique way to spend the evening. She and her friends hadn’t all been together in a long time, so everyone really enjoyed themselves.
Later in the evening, after they had eaten dinner and the murderer had been unmasked, they were all just sitting together in the living room drinking and enjoying each other’s company. She checked her phone and saw an Instagram notification. She thought it was just someone liking the pic she had posted of herself in character, (Kitty Killer: journalist, biographer, spy… not a cat killer), but it was actually a message from Jon.
He was, in fact, complimenting the photo, but he also messaged just to catch up and see what she was up to. Obviously he realized she was busy, but he told her that she was welcome to stop by afterwards. At this point she was already a bottle of wine deep, so the thought of hooking up after a fun night with her friends was too tempting to pass up.
It was after 2am when she and her friend, and her friends husband who was DD, had finally left. She got a ride to their place, then called a cab to drive her the rest of the way to Jon’s house. She texted him when she arrived, and he came out front to meet her…